SAN FRANCISCO - U.S. Air Force psychiatrist John Hensala got a wonderful education at top private universities, entirely paid for by the government.
In exchange for a four-year commitment to the military, he earned a medical degree at Northwestern University, then worked as a resident for three years at Yale, unburdened by the costs of tuition and books.
Then, seven months before he was to report for full-time military duty, he announced to his superiors that he is gay, and was promptly discharged.
Now Uncle Sam wants $70,000 back - a demand it has made to 100 other gays who have been ousted from the Air Force's medical program.
But Hensala, 35, won't pay. He's suing in federal court to avoid reimbursing the government in what the Air Force says is the first suit of its kind.
''This is largely on principle,'' said Hensala in an interview in his spacious flat in the city's largely gay Castro District.
''I would be able to pay back the funds eventually,'' said Hensala, who still wears his dark brown hair in a short, military-style cut. ''But an employer who fires someone just because they're gay ... I don't think its the right of the employer to say 'You owe us this money.'''
The Air Force, which has not questioned Hensala's sexual orientation, maintains that Hensala chose his timing carefully in order to get out of active duty service.
''There is very strong evidence that Capt. Hensala made the homosexual statement, hoping to trigger separation and avoid his active duty commitment,'' an investigating officer reported.
Hensala signed up in 1986, prior to the military's ''Don't Ask, Don't Tell'' policy, and entered the Armed Forces Health Professions Scholarship Program.
In exchange for tuition and other schooling costs, Hensala served 20 weeks of active duty over the next four years, mostly getting additional medical training during short stints in the summers.
The Air Force agreed to defer his active duty service during his three-year residency at Yale, and then put it off again while he took a two-year fellowship in child psychiatry at the University of California, San Francisco.
Finally, in November 1994, the Air Force told him that his four years of active duty would have to begin the following year.
Days later, Hensala announced that he is gay.
''In light of recent policy changes concerning homosexuality ... I have decided that I should inform you, prior to beginning active duty service, that I am gay,'' his letter to his superiors said. ''I do not believe this will affect my ability to serve in the Air Force as a child psychiatrist.''
The Air Force told Hensala not to report to Scott Air Force Base near St. Louis, and launched an investigation. He was interviewed for about 40 minutes in August 1996, answering questions about his understanding of the military's policy on gays, his membership in gay activist groups, his current relationships and what prompted his coming out to his Air Force superiors.
He told them: ''I had reached a point in my development as a person where I was not comfortable hiding things from people, and I felt it was important to my mental health to be able to be open about that.''
During the nearly two-year Air Force investigation, Hensala moved on with his life. He started a successful private practice and began working with gays and lesbians. Eventually, he was fully ''out'' as a young, gay man.
''I didn't feel I should go back into the closet,'' Hensala told The AP. ''As a psychiatrist, I can't say I just can't talk about my life for at least four years.''
Hensala said he had no idea he was gay when he joined the military. His ''coming out'' happened ''very gradually, very reluctantly,'' he said. In the fall of 1988, he told his secret to his parents and a few close friends.
''When I first realized it, it didn't seem like an issue ... I didn't feel the need to be out with my co-workers on a military base,'' he said.
But as he matured, he said he realized he couldn't tell patients to live their lives with integrity if he couldn't do this as well.
''Being dishonest with coworkers flies in the face of who I was trying to be as a human being,'' he said.
The Department of Defense's ''Don't Ask, Don't Tell'' policy allows the military to discharge service members who admit to being homosexual unless they prove that they ''do not engage in, attempt or intend to engage in, or have a propensity to engage in homosexual acts.''
In theory, a homosexual could continue to serve in the armed forces as long as he or she promised to remain celibate.
When the Air Force investigator asked Hensala in 1996 whether he ''engaged in or attempted to engage in homosexual acts,'' he refused to answer.
''Since Capt. Hensala has not rebutted the presumption of homosexual conduct, he is, therefore, subject to discharge,'' the investigator concluded.
In November 1997, Hensala received an honorable discharge and was ordered to reimburse the government $68,536.50 for tuition, $1,902.31 for books, $150 for boards, $285 for equipment rental and $555.72 for supplies.
''They want to punish everyone who comes out, so they order recoupment,'' said Hensala's lawyer, Stephen Collier. ''It's ridiculous.''
The Air Force contends Hensala's timing was suspect.
In a letter dated Nov. 30, 1994, the Air Force notified Hensala to schedule a physical before entering full-time service. On Dec. 12, after he hired a lawyer, Hensala proclaimed his homosexuality. He got a physical on Jan. 18, 1995 and then submitted a list of gay rights groups with which he was involved and a list of people who could confirm his homosexuality. Finally, Hensala called his adviser at Scott Air Force Base and asked about housing for his boyfriend.
''Contrary to what he professes, Capt. Hensala did not want to fulfill his part of the 'professional education for professional service to the Air Force' bargain,'' the officer wrote.
Hensala argued that he was just trying to gauge the climate at Scott, whether it was gay-friendly or not.
The Servicemembers Legal Defense Network, which deals specifically with fallout from ''Don't Ask, Don't Tell,'' says Hensala's case proves the six-year-old policy doesn't work.
''The policy, when it was created, said that sexual orientation was a personal and private matter,'' said Stacey Sobel, the group's legal director. ''The way it has worked in reality is private conversations can sometimes be a basis for getting you kicked out.''
Air Force spokesman Maj. Chet Curtis said 100 Air Force members who graduated from its medical program were discharged between January 1996 and July 1999 for being gay. All have been asked to repay the money and none have sued. Most are in the process of repaying the government, he said.
Many people simply pay back the money for fear of receiving a bad credit rating or because they don't realize they can fight it, Sobel said. And sometimes the government backs down after appeals through military channels.
This appears to be the first lawsuit by any ousted gay service member against reimbursing the government for education costs, according to Sobel and spokespeople for the Army, Navy and Marines.
Sobel added that her group has assisted 62 former members of the Army, Navy, Air Force and Marines in challenging the demands outside of civilian courts.
Last year alone, 1,034 people were discharged from all branches of the military for being gay, an increase of more than 70 percent since before the ''Don't Ask, Don't Tell'' policy went into effect in 1994, Sobel said.
The Air Force has until July 17 to respond to the recent lawsuit.
As for Hensala, his private practice in San Francisco is thriving, but he says he would rejoin the Air Force tomorrow if they wanted him.
''There were a lot of elements I really liked,'' he said. ''I wanted to serve but I didn't feel I could abide by a policy that was bad for my own mental health.''