I'm part of the generation of mothers who grew up in the era of women's liberation. Along with many parents, I wanted to be sure my daughter had every opportunity when it came to education. Now it appears that we may not be paying as much attention to the options for our sons.
Today, more women than men enroll in college and universities in the United States, and the percentage of men continues to drop every year. In 2004, 42.9 percent of all undergraduate students were men, according to the U.S. Department of Education. In some racial and ethnic groups, the divide between women and men was even greater. More than a third of black students were men. Just more than four out of 10 Hispanic students were men.
What can we, as parents, do to encourage our sons to go to college? Start by letting them know at a young age that we expect them to go to college. If you have a college or university nearby, get your family involved in activities there. Visit the campus library, exhibits or museums. Send your son to summer camps at the college. Take him to a baseball game or a gymnastics meet. Getting your son on campus early and often will help him feel that he "belongs" there. He may begin to think that's what he'll do after high school.
After grade school, boys who do well at school can be targeted as "not cool" or "nerds." Comments from friends and classmates seem more important than parental advice. One way to decrease that pressure is to find a mentor for your son. Find someone whom he thinks is "cool," and who you know worked hard in school and went to college.
There are formal mentoring programs that you can find through schools or community groups. Another way to find a "cool" mentor is to look at the young men your son may look up to. This could include an older cousin or family member, a family friend, a former baby-sitter, even the college student who used to live down the street.
Ask these young men to take your son under their wings. Maybe they can take some time to explain what "really matters". With recent experience at dealing with peer pressure, they could put a good spin on taking those advanced classes and working hard on homework. A young mentor is a good role model for your son to think of if someone at school badgers him about being a "nerd."
We also need to make sure our sons understand what it takes to get into college. A woman I know was surprised when she got the results from a test her son took in eighth grade. The test, which some schools give their students to see if they are on track for college, showed that her son was not preparing himself in the classroom.
When she asked her son what he thought of the results, he told her he wasn't worried about it since he'd planned on getting a baseball scholarship for college or going pro.
To show her son what he really needed for college, my friend took her son to the state university a few hours away, where he met with an admissions counselor. The university helped him get a better idea of what he really needed to do in school in order to get ready for his future.
They're also working with the counselors at both the middle and high schools to make sure that her son takes the right classes and stays on track for college. The young man still wants to play pro ball, but if that doesn't work out, he is looking at becoming a banker.
Giving our sons the opportunities to become bankers, engineers, doctors or whatever they want to be is the new challenge for today's parents. We've done a fantastic job at giving our daughters more opportunities to excel. We need to be sure to focus on our sons as well.
• Rose Rennekamp, vice president of communications for ACT, can be e-mailed at askrose@act.org. She has a master's degree in guidance and counseling.