Still fighting on the wrong front after Sept. 11, 2001

The awful horror of 9/11 is still raw and with us, five years and counting. We are reminded of the pain of our nation and the families so brutally affected, and that we have not yet quashed Osama bin Laden and al Qaida. We are fighting in Iraq when we should have directed our outrage to Afghanistan and Pakistan. We can only hope for strong and lucid leaders to appear soon, conquer the terrorists, and get us out of Iraq. Only then will the memories of 9/11 ease. Good luck.

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Ahhhh, we see there's some work going on at D-Vine Wine on Stewart Street, just like we saw some workers at the Ormsby House again. Maybe, they're in a race to see who'll be done first. We're betting on the wine.

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Diane Bertram, director of the Volunteers in Partnership with the Sheriff (VIPS), informs us that the Carson City Sheriff's Office will conduct a Citizens Academy beginning Sept. 27 from 6-9 p.m. each Wednesday for six weeks. The deadline to apply is Sept. 20. So if you'd like to find out how your sheriff's office works or become a volunteer, this is your chance to get a great overview of all the departments, and learn something to boot. Call Chief Bev Moltz at 887-2020, ext. 1904, for details or to sign up. It's both informative and fun.

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And Diane said she had not seen Vern Manke in quite a while, so it was great to see his name mentioned in our column a couple of weeks ago, and not in the obits (giggle, giggle).

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Chicago Bob asked us if we knew why mermaids wear seashells? We didn't know. "Because B-shells are too small, and D-shells are too big." Ohhhhhh ...

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Nevada sports are in the news these days: Darryl Rasner won his first game with the Yankees ... hooray (Maizie is still miffed about losing out on his autographed baseball she bid on at the CHS booster's dinner ... bah humbug); Las Vegas' Andre Agassi, one of the greatest tennis players ever, retired at the US Open this week, he will be missed; WNCC's women's soccer team is going great guns, as is the men's baseball team in fall exhibitions; the CHS Blue Thunder band is terrific; and, finally, Travis Hall, of Carson City, has signed a pro contract as a goalie with the Western Hockey Association's Bellingham "Bulls" in Washington ... way to go, Travis. Good sports, all ...

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There will be new signs at the corner of Minnesota and West Fifth soon. Seems some people don't know how to drive and can't recognize when to stop at a stop sign (they took out a fence at that corner). We think the driver's tests should be a lot more stringent to keep the dodos off the streets.

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DeeAnn (do we even need her last name anymore?) told us about "Boudreaux the Baptist." Seems "Boudreaux lived in Louisiana, and every Friday would fire up his grill and cook a venison steak. His Catholic neighbors were so upset he ate meat on Fridays that they went to the local priest and complained. The priest then went to Boudreaux and suggested that he become a Catholic, too, so, after several classes and much study, Boudreaux converted to the Catholic faith, and the priest baptized him saying, 'You were born a Baptist, and raised a Baptist, but now you are a Catholic.' The neighbors were very happy until the first Friday after Boudreaux's conversion they again caught the smell of venison coming from his yard. They rushed to the priest, who then rushed to Boudreaux's preparing to scold him, when he stopped in amazement as he saw Boudreaux sprinkle the grilled venison chanting, 'You wuz born a deer, an' you wuz raised a deer, but now you is a catfish.'" Amen.

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Good stuff coming up this week: Salsa y Salsas will be held at the Legislative Plaza this Saturday. Great food, music and beautiful dancing. Call 885-1055 for details. Also, Proscenium Player's first show of the season, Arthur Miller's classic, "Death of a Salesman," starring that wonderful actor Pat Hardy, will open Friday at 8 p.m. at the Brewery Arts Center, 449 W. King St. There will be the traditional "opening night" champagne party after the show. Call 883-1976 for dates, matinees and prices. And St. Teresa's annual Basque Festival will be Sunday at Fuji Park ... great food here, too. Call 882-2079 or 882-1968 for tickets.

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Auditions are coming up for PPI's "Blood Brothers," on Sept. 18 and 19 at 7 p.m. at the Brewery Arts Center. It's a musical about "twins in Liverpool, England, separated at birth, who later forge a friendship" despite the difficulties they face. For information on the roles, call director Tony DeGeiso at (775) 233-3102 or e-mail renotony@aol.com. If you want to sing your hearts out, this is your chance.

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Steve Wassner, an attorney in town, sent us this handy tip: "Blood stains on clothes? Not to worry. Just pour a little hydrogen peroxide on a cloth and proceed to wipe off every drop of blood. Works every time. (Now, where to hide the body?)" Hmmmm ... no comment.

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Nice people: Kim Riggs, as pretty on the inside as she is on the outside; birthday girls Lexie Lequerica (who turned 10 and had a wonderful day at "Girly Girl" in Reno with her friends), Kim Johnston and Christi Schmid (ages unknown ... well, known, but not disclosed); Pat Devereux, copy editor at the Appeal, who stopped by Helaine's new house to say hello on her walk; Don, Rod, Anna and Stephanie at Mallard's for always being nice; the Cordiscos, just because; and everyone else who stops us and says hi ... thanks. You've put up with us for two years now, and we appreciate it.

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Scam warning: For anyone who's been called and told, "If you send us money, we'll send you thousands (millions, whatever) of dollars you've 'won.'" Tell them to deduct it from your "winnings." No reputable contest will ask you for money, so don't fall for that and send it to them. You'll never see a cent in return.

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We leave you with an anonymous wish sent to us by Ms. Parsons: "When I die, I want to die like my grandfather, who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car." Have a great week.

• Carolyn Tate and Maizie Harris Jesse are longtime Carson City residents. Write to them at editor@nevadaappeal.com.