A place to share support

For families who have a loved one with Alzheimer's or other form of dementia, living a normal life is an oxymoron.

There's no such thing as normal - it's just life.

However, there is a place in Carson City that can provide some relief to families in caring for their loved one. "Share the Day," located within the Carson City Senior Citizens Center, 911 Beverly Drive, is a day center for those suffering from forms of dementia.

Open from 8 a.m.-5 p.m. Monday-Friday, Share the Day is a licensed day center which offers activities, quiet time and a meal while be cared for by trained personnel. They call their clients guests.

"They actually help us out with tasks," said Tammy Sisson, owner of Share the Day. "We're not a day-care center - they don't need to be baby-sat."

Debbie Parker, program coordinator, said programs are designed for guests according to their needs, including exercise therapy, recreation and fun activities. No medications are dispensed as the center would be required to have a registered nurse on staff, adding to the cost of operation.

"We schedule according to their mood and what they want to do," Sisson added. "Sometimes they get agitated and want to nap, but the programs are built to their interests."

Jack Summers, 70, has been a guest for two years. He was a foreman before retiring and continues his "job" at Share the Day.

"We talk about job issues with Jack and he helps us do our job here," Parker said.

Jack's wife, Karyl, works for the state of Nevada, said they used to travel quite a bit and the lack of social life has been hard on them.

"He's not interested any longer," Karyl said. "He has no concept of what it's about because of the steady progression of Alzheimer's.

"But the center has been good for him. It helps him maintain a higher level of function rather than just sitting somewhere. The human contact is very important."

Bruce Scott, president of the governing board of the Carson City Senior Citizens Center, used to take his mother to Share the Day.

"My sisters (Linda and Kathy) and I were involved with Share the Day through the participation of our mother, Vivian Scott," he said. "She is in assisted living and no longer able to participate, but we had a great experience while she could attend.

"They were caring and really went way beyond what you would expect to accommodate her and make her comfortable. They involved mother in activities and got her to participate in some social interaction through patience and lots of effort on their part.

"As a cranky 87-year-old, Mother was not the easiest person to deal with. She actively resisted everything that wasn't presented by one of the three of us being with her. However, she always enjoyed her time, once she was there. She actually had a good time in spite of herself."

There is no other business like Share the Day in Carson City. The Legacy Corps program through RSVP offers respite care to families for limited hours during the day depending on the patient's needs.

Legacy Corps has 31 volunteers providing respite care to more than 100 people, for which families donate on financial ability.

"We've been active in the community more than four years," said Ken Stanfield, project director and volunteer. "Money for the program comes from federal grants - we were refused by the city and state for grant funds."

Stanfield said a recently study by the Alzheimer's Association noted between 70-80 percent of caregivers (of Alzheimer's patients) die before the patient.

"There's a period of guilt and not wanting to leave their loved one alone," Stanfield said. "Then there's the realization they need to get out and get a break if they're going to continue to care for their loved one. It's a very important change in mental thinking."

The Legacy Corps program is in need of volunteers. Stanfield said volunteers must show interest and undergo a background check, tuberculosis test and CPR/first-aid training and then receive 30-40 hours of pre-service training.

"Our respite care covers everything from autism to ADHD to multiple sclerosis to Alzheimer's," he said.

Parker said the main thing about Share the Day is they provide a safe and secure place for a family's loved one, and that grant funds are available through the Alzheimer's Association.

"We want the guest to feel safe and loved and know they cannot do anything wrong here," she said."

"The adult day program is absolutely wonderful," Karyl Summers said. "It has allowed me to continue working and keeps me in a normal, natural environment every day.

"Then I'm able to spend better quality time with Jack. I don't have that trapped feeling, and I think a lot of people do (feel that way) if they're honest about it."

• Contact Rhonda Costa-Landers at rcosta-landers@nevadaappeal.com or 881-1223.