Phone calls with old friends

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By Dave Frank


Appeal Staff Writer


Sometimes I don't return phone calls to old friends because I mismanage my time. I'll usually get the calls at work, ignore them and tell myself I'll return them when I get home.


My old friends call when I'm at work because they are from Eastern time zones or like to call people in the middle of the day.


I always consider returning the phone call as I'm driving home. I then decide the car ride is too short for a conversation and tell myself it'd be strange to rove from the car to the house in the middle of a phone call.


The situation needs parameters.


I decide I need to watch television or eat dinner when I get inside. I can't talk in the middle of either of those things because it would be rude.


After that, I might watch another television show or go to a store to buy something. My friend is now probably too tired to talk and would be offended if I called.


I usually end up returning the call about a week later. I call at a time I don't think the person will answer because there is no excuse for waiting a week to return the phone call of a person you don't hate.


I'm not sure why I wait this long, but it could be because talking on the phone with someone you used to talk with in person is exhausting.


You have to learn about all the new things your friend does and all the entertaining things mutual friends are doing. You have to learn what your old friend might do in the future.


I think I could care about those things, just not all at once.


Also, a conversation of the length and depth of a long distance phone call is probably not like the conversations you used to have. The things old friends have to talk about during phone calls are things that would otherwise be discussed over a period of several years.


The purpose of this phone call is to preserve a friendship. It does not accomplish a task in the way past conversations did. It has no mission. There are no plans developed.


Old friends also collect new friends and new experiences you don't see and can't make yourself care about. You can give your blessing to those things, but that's all.


I guess the best thing to do is not to talk at all until you live in the same city again. Once that happens, you can develop a plan.


•••


Josh McBirney has been named director of maintenance for the Wild Horse and World Famous Mustang Ranch brothels. McBirney, 34, has experience in construction and maintenance and prior to coming to work at the brothels he owned his own company.


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PetSmart has opened a hiring center in its distribution facility currently under construction at the Tahoe Reno Industrial Center. Pay starts $13.75 an hour for the day shift that will consist of four 10-hour days and $15 per hour for 12-hour shifts on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. PetSmart plans to start shipping product in June and be in full operation by August.




• Contact reporter Dave Frank at dfrank@nevadaappeal.com or 881-1212.