VIRGINIA CITY " Greg Bolander and his family are members of a club that no one wants to join.
But the camaraderie that comes from it was in full force on Wednesday night when the Bolanders were joined by two other families who also had lost their sons in overseas conflicts.
"This is not only for Bryan, but for all the fallen soldiers. They are heroes in our hearts and always will be," Bolander said to a small gathering in the Delta Saloon parking lot at a candlelight vigil on the anniversary of his son's death.
Staff Sgt. Bryan Bolander, 26, was killed when the vehicle he was riding in ran over an improvised explosive device in Baghdad, Iraq, on April 29, 2008. Ed Schober and his wife Virginia of Carson City were there on behalf of Ed's son Sgt. Anthony Schober, 23, killed May 12, 2007.
Debbie Walker and her husband Ben were there on behalf Debbie's son, Douglas High School graduate, Chief Warrant Officer Joshua Rodgers, 29, killed May 30, 2007, in the Sangin Valley of Afghanistan.
"We all stay together and try not to remember how they died, but how they lived," said Debbie Walker.
The families take part every Friday in the Red Shirt Walk down Carson Street to honor Rodgers and all servicemembers. They are joined together by their grief and find comfort in their friendship.
The event was informal. No prepared statements were made and it turned into more of a discussion than a display.
Rodgers' uncle, Mike McElfish, told of his mission to supply troops with vortex flash suppressors that suppress the muzzle flash, protecting troop positions.
Through his fundraising efforts so far, McElfish has sent 734 flash suppressors to the troops on the ground.
He also asked the crowd to e-mail him letters of support and gratitude to include in care packages he sends.
Several in the crowd vowed to help.
Many commented on their own children serving in the military, some thanked veterans among the group.
Others offered their condolences through tear-filled eyes.
"In this community, we carry your son, and all the sons and daughters with us every day," Cathylee James said to the families.
To donate money to buy flash suppressors, or to write a letter of support, contact Mike McElfish at unclemikeccnv@sbcglobal.net. For more information visit www.myspace.com/unclemikeusa