Nobody Asked Us, But ...

In the last two weeks of his administration, George W. Bush has been pardoning convicted criminals (other presidents have had the same power and have done so). We urge you to contact the president to pardon U.S. Border Patrol agents, Ignacio Ramos and Jose Compean, who shot and wounded a drug runner smuggling over 700 pounds of marijuana into this country. While there is disagreement over their conviction, the fact is, they kept the marijuana from going to market in this country.

The smuggler was given immunity by a federal prosecutor for his testimony and returned to Mexico. Contact the president at 202-456-1111 (the White House comment line), or write to him at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW, Washington, D.C. 20500-0003, for their release. And our thanks to W. L. Gerow AEC U.S.N. (retired) for the reminder.

While we're on serious matters, Chris DeWitt reiterates a stance we have taken in the past about using the Yucca Mountain dump as a "cash cow" for Nevada. If we can discover how to split the atom, send men to the moon, and invent "pet rocks," you can be sure we're bright enough in the next 25-50 years to find a way to stabilize nuclear waste. Actually, France, Germany and England (as well as some other countries) recycle 97 percent of the junk, but apparently we're too cheap to do it. With talk of many new reactors being built for clean energy in the near future, it's time to stare down the bogeyman and take advantage of him. Just remember 100 years ago, more or less, we didn't have TV, cars, cell phones, airplanes, rocket ships, Big Macs or Paris Hilton. If we can't come up with a better solution, we DESERVE to "glow."

Ken Fraser strikes again with this one off the Internet: "The World's Shortest Fairy Tale ... Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl, 'Will you marry me?' The girl said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted. The End."

Good stuff: May Judge Bill Maddox enjoy his retirement; and may Mayor Marv Teixeira be only "slightly" toasted tomorrow night at the Nugget Rotary Roast, remembering his 12 years as mayor of our grand and glorious city. They both deserve ... hmmmm ... maybe we should let you add your own "deservisms." (draw devilish grin in here __________ ) Love ya, Marv and Bill.

Congratulations to the McQueen Marching Band in the Rose Bowl Parade New Year's Day. They looked and sounded mighty sharp in their blue and black uniforms and colorful flags. Just like CHS did in the 1965 parade. Happy birthday to Jessi Winchester and Kapono Fuller for turning a year older; and thank you to "a concerned citizen" for fixing someone's doors and locks. By the way, Carolyn got a new vacuum cleaner ... "it really sucks." (yup, we know that's baaaaaad)

With so many "Bowl Games," we thought we could creatively rename some of them (we were inspired by the UNR bowl game ... the Roady's Humanitarian Bowl) ... i.e., The Fanny Mae Toilet Bowl; The Freddie Mac "Up In Smoke" Pipe Dream Bowl; The Chrysler Cry Baby Cereal Bowl; The AIG/Lehmann Brothers "In the Soup" Bowl. You probably have your own names. Remember, it's only $$$$$.

Coming up: Tonight at 7 p.m. at the Community Center is the Carson High School Talent Show ... a "don't miss;" and beginning Wednesday, Jan.14 at Comma Coffee at 5:30 p.m., Deana Hoover will be starting an eight week class in writing, "Write Now." To enroll, or for more information, contact Deana at 883-5789 or deanasarts@yahoo.com. If you've been putting off writing your novel, now's the time to start (you have to do something after breaking your resolutions).

- Carolyn Tate and Maizie Harris Jesse are longtime Carson City residents. They can be reached by e-mail at editor@nevadaappeal.com.