The Popcorn Stand: It sounds better than “shoe pizza”

I don’t know if I should say this is the end of civilization as we know it or that this is the greatest thing to happen to civilization since sliced bread. Of course, I shouldn’t use that phrase since I agree with George Carlin when he asked what’s so great about sliced bread. It’s bread and you slice it.

I don’t know if this shows how far we’ve come as a society or how far we’ve declined as a society. When my dad went to high school, kids were wearing Converse high tops. Now kids will be wearing “Pie Tops.”

That’s right. Pizza Hut has designed a new way to order pizza — with your shoe. Pizza Hut is delivering a new type of sneaker called the Pie Tops.

I think this invention is right up there with the McDonald’s scientific straw that allows you to drink your Shamrock Shake much easier. Just think of it – while you’re out and about walking in your Pie Tops easily drinking a Shamrock Shake, you can now order a pizza right where you are.

A button on the tongue of the right shoe connects with a mobile app on the wearer’s phone. This allows you to instantly submit a pizza order wherever you are standing or sitting – just by pressing the tongue of their shoe and viola, the pizza is delivered to right where you are.

Evidently the Pie Tops aren’t available for the general public as only 64 pairs of the Pie Tops have been created in honor of the 64 teams who play in March Madness. Apparently, the creators of the shoes don’t realize the NCAA Tournament has been expanded to 68 teams.

It still hasn’t stopped Pizza Hut from doing this commercial with Grant Hill www.nbcnews.com/tech/tech-news/pizza-hut-just-introduced-pie-top-sneakers-can-order-your-n728761. I would have done a commercial with somebody impersonating Ed Sullivan saying “It’s a Really Big Shoe.” Then again, I’m sure Millennials have no idea who Ed Sullivan is.

But it’s still one small step for man, one giant leap for pizza kind.

— Charles Whisnand