Advice to al Qaeda computer users on deleting files

Al Qaeda Interoffice Memo

From: Information Services Department

To: Dr. Ayman al-Zawahri, Mohammed Atef and other leaders of the glorious movement to rid the world of decadent Western influences

Re: Security of computer files

Dear brothers,

Glory to God! It has come to the attention of employees of the IS Department here at al Qaeda that some members of our movement may be unaware of the danger of leaving highly sensitive, personal files on the hard drives of computers that may be left behind when our company is persuaded to relocate by Northern Alliance troops.

We refer specifically to a Wall Street Journal article of Dec. 31, in which reporters Alan Cullison and Andrew Higgins describe how they were able to download and copy hundreds of secret al Qaeda files from computers they purchased for $1,100 from a merchant in Kabul.

We will not go into the obvious improprieties involving a so-called "looter" who removed the computers from our offices in Kabul shortly after our company's rather sudden departure. Nor the apparent questions of copyright infringement on the part of the Wall Street Journal. We leave such issues to the Legal Department.

We are concerned, however, that so many of al Qaeda's terror facilitators both in Afghanistan and around the globe seem to have disregarded our previous memo of July 1998 on data security.

Herewith, a few reminders:

-- Passwords should be changed every few weeks.

Please do not use common words that could be guessed easily by unauthorized personnel attempting to gain access to confidential files. For example, "Osama" no longer offers even the least protection as a password and should be avoided, although we realize it is easy to remember.

-- When using your company-issued terrorist alias on correspondence, it is a bad idea to store them in files labeled with your real name.

-- Similarly, it defeats the purpose of encoding plans for biological weapons with the words al Zabadi, which is Arabic for "curdled milk," if you are then going to use the words "home-brew nerve gas" in the plan itself.

-- Remember that any work done on company time using company computers belongs to the company. Please delete the cartoons of George W. Bush and any photos of women with their ankles exposed.

-- All personnel matters are to remain confidential. According to the Wall Street Journal article, a report was contained in the hard drive critical of our branch office in Yemen.

It notes that an associate was disciplined after he was overheard talking "in an unsuitable way" with a woman on the telephone and had then tried to dodge questions about the relationship by "pretending to be busy reading the Quran."

Such disclosures obviously are unhealthy for company morale and tend to discredit the good name of al Qaeda around the world.

-- Care should be taken to protect sensitive information from our competitors. For example, the Journal reporters also found correspondance from one of our operatives that may have given competitors insight into our financial condition.

"I am almost broke," the operative wrote. "The money I have may not last until the feast. Please send money or bring it to us as soon as possible."

Such disclosures could have given the Northern Alliance the idea that members of our organization could be persuaded to switch sides for the price of two loaves of bread and some goat's milk.

-- In circumstances when it appears relocation of al Qaeda corporate offices is imminent, due to U.S. bombs falling like rain from the sky or similar emergency, associates should first make sure they have disconnected the computer from the power supply for their own safety.

They should then carry the hard drive to the nearest window and drop it outside, making sure it shatters on the street below. (For offices on the ground floor of buildings, if time permits take the hard drive to the roof before following the above instructions.)

-- We also refer you to the recent memo from our Audio-Visual Department, which advice can also be applied to computer files. "Don't put anything on videotape you don't want to see on CNN." It is unfortunate Our Leader had not been advised of this policy prior to his dinner meeting with a Saudi Arabian sheik.

Once you have read the contents of this memo, please delete it.

P.S. Due to unforeseen budget constraints and the downward curve of Afghanistan's economy, the upgrade to Windows XP is temporarily on hold.