Meet Mr. Cabbage

I'm not allowed to keep a dog or cat in my apartment, so I bought a hamster.

I wanted to get a turtle for a long time but I found out those would be too much work. After that, I wanted to get a tortoise. They only eat lettuce and act depressed.

I found out tortoises are too expensive, though, and will potentially live forever.

The life span of my teddy bear hamster, Mr. Cabbage, is between two and three years. That is long enough for a meaningful relationship, but short enough to avoid difficult decisions.

I won't ever have to give my hamster away if I eventually move. I won't ever have to euthanize him if I one day have a child with hamster allergies.

My hamster is also a mammal, so I won't have to give him away out of embarrassment.

"Why would you have a pet Gila Monster?" a friend will never say to me.

I understand that someone might point out that the owners of hamsters are usually children, but those hamsters live tortured lives. I want to set a new standard.

One of the ways I've already done this is by feeding him cabbage. The pet store rodent expert told me it helps hamsters with nervousness.

I even drew a picture of my hamster on the dry erase board in my kitchen.

"Cabbage makes me feel better," the caption says.

I like my hamster a lot but I'm glad I only got one. I heard hamsters were social, so I was going to buy two. But the rodent expert at the pet store told me that would be a bad idea because two male hamsters will fight each other to the death once they mature.

The thought of a fight between two teddy bear hamsters was terrible.

Fighting another hamster would be especially bad for Mr. Cabbage because I think he would die.

He seems to have no violence in his heart. I don't think he's ever even thought about hurting anyone.

"This carrot looks delicious," he might think, or, "time to add more tissue strips to my nest."

The one fault that Mr. Cabbage does have is that he's lazy.

I know hamsters are nocturnal, but if I wake up in the middle of the night he's not doing very much.

Sometimes he'll get spurts of energy, but when I put him in his hamster ball recently, he just tried to gnaw through the plastic.

"Let me get back to my cage," he thought. "I need to eat some cabbage."

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Executive Chef Martin Rodriguez has revised and greatly expanded the menu of the Wild Horse Saloon and Restaurant near the Tahoe Reno Industrial Center.

The Wild Horse's new menu offers sandwiches, burgers, salads, pasta chicken, steak, seafood, a selection of south-of-the-border dishes and some specials at the bar. Breakfast items include New York steak and eggs, pancakes, french toast to numerous omelets. The Wild Horse is open 24 hours a day.

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The Sierra Nevada Association of Realtors recently recognized four members, each for 25 years of membership: John Borda of Century 21 Jim Wilson Realty; Kress Cave of Brokers Group Inc.; Jeanne Zemarel of RE/MAX Realty Affiliates in Gardnerville and Jenny Lopiccolo, Coldwell Banker Best Sellers.

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Carson Valley Medical Center now uses the Philips MultiDiagnost Eleva multi-purpose X-ray system. This system offers diverse X-ray capabilities, including interventional radiology procedures such as angiograms, angioplasty, kyphoplasty, or other treatments requiring central venous access. The MultiDiagnost Eleva produces the finest image quality at the lowest possible dose of radiation, and is designed with patient comfort in mind. For more information, call 782-1512.

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Southwest Gas has donated $6,000 to the Northern Nevada American Red Cross to help Fernley relief efforts.

- Contact reporter Dave Frank at dfrank@nevadaappeal.com or 881-1212.